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‘W-We didn’t had a wedding ceremony? But she was the empress of the empire, she should have the grand royal wedding as i dreamt today. Also a crowning ceremony...’

Cathain was lost in his thoughts. In his dream, he had seen her wearing her own crown. So, the wedding he saw never happened and it was only his dream?

Eleanora suddenly stood up and without looking at him, she opened her mouth to speak.

“Please excuse me, Your highness.”

Saying this, she turned to leave the camp area.

“Eleanora!”

Cathain wanted to chase after her bit he thought he shouldn’t right now. So, he step back and let her go.

_____

.....

Eleanora run as fast as she could into the forest.

She doesn’t want her tears to drop down from her eyes. But she also can’t stop them from flowing out.

And finally she stopped as her legs gave out,falling on the ground with a loud thud.

Her tears started to pour out from her eyes like waterfall ans sensing there is no one around her, she let out a loud yell.

“WHY????”

“Why are you asking me all this now??? Why after all this?? Why does he remembers?? Why goddess, why??”

“If you want him to remember everything, tie him up with me again, then why did you sent me back to save the world where i can’t even save myself?”

“How can i face the man who killed me and my babies with his own hands? I can’t even blame him because the ‘him’ in present didn’t even did anything wrong?!”

“I can’t take revenge on him either as he will soon remember everything!!!”

Eleanora was sobbing really hard, the past she kept locked in her cold heart, he is trying to break it and let it out.

How expectant the past her was, about wedding ceremony with him, how well she planned her own crowning ceremony.

But in the end, Cathain just made her the empress by a official notice.

No celebration, No white dress, No ceremony!

She had to wear her own crown by her own and take it off on her own too.

She attended others wedding party and imagine how her own wedding would be. How she would look into a white dress.

Cathain had surely gave her a white dress... A prisoner shabby white dress for her death penalty.

Everyone ridiculed her about being an empress without any royal wedding and crowning ceremony.

But she ignored all this, as long as he was her husband. She didn’t mind not having a wedding ceremony as long as she was his only bride.

In the end, it turned out he was not her either.

What did she lacked? looks? family background? education? qualifications?

No, she didn’t lacked anything. The only thing she lacked was her father’s love and love from the man she loved, married.

Eleanora hates herself more for crying over the man who killed her.

Hating herself for not being able to hate him as she should do.

The present him is making her past just a distant memory of hers, that kept repeating everytime he acts different from the past.

She can’t help but compare them together.

Even wishes that she have been keeping into herself from the past is like awakening up, telling her to fulfil the happy dreams that she had about him.

Her cold heart still contains all the painful memory that she endured all alone.

Now, he is coming, knocking at her cold doors with his new warmness.

Seeking permission to come in, to hold her hands again, warm up her cold heart.

Past the cold dark nights full of painful memories, is there anything new to reach beyond the harsh memories, waiting for her?

Even if she is born again, she is still stuck into the past harshness she faced.

Does he really thinks he can warm her up again?

She waited countless days for him, only to get more pain in her choosen road that lead her toward destruction.

No matter how she wants to face it, it’s suffocating to repeat the same fate, fearing to face the same lonliness again.

Seeing the same man that broke her heart into pieces, trying to fix it.

The past image kept repeating in her minds, Eleanora felt like she was struck into the abyss again.

Everything around her was becoming dark and she was feeling her vision go blurry.

“Ele!!!”

‘A-Ain? Or Dad?’

‘They can’t be here... who is calling me?’

Eleanora heard someone calling her by her nickname and felt a warm hands wrapping around her, bringing her more closer as she felt a fast beating heart near hers.

It was the same as how she felt when she was pulled up from the pool when she first came back in the past again.

“Don’t cry...”

“Am sorry if i have reminded you something unpleasant. But please, Don’t cry...”

“I won’t mention anything else anymore, I promise.”

His voice was shaking as he talked to her and hold her with his trembling hands.

Eleanora raised her shaky hands and trailed them on his strong back as she started to brust into crying again.

She is finally letting out all the pain she had kept hiding in her heart alone.

Her tears kept flowing until there was no more tears to shed.

She hugged him tightly and burried her head into his chest, listening to his fast heartbeat as she closed her eyes.

“Sleep... Don’t think about anything.”

The offer sounded tempting to Eleanora and she seemed like forget about everything that occupied her mind till now.

Then she felt someone’s lips touching her forehead and relaxed her frowned brows.

The past, as well the present worries started to fade and slowly disappear from her mind.

She only wants to sleep comfortably in his warm embrace now.

Eleanora slowly fall asleep as he kept stroking her hair gently.

It’s finally peaceful again...