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Fei Long could tell that there was something going on with Desmond, maybe several things, but it was obvious that Desmond was trying to keep up appearances, so she didn’t call it out. Having seen through at least one of Desmond’s problems, Fei Long used it to divert attention. “It looks like you’ve just undergone multiple breakthroughs, and you haven’t had time to get used to your new strength, I guess that’s where the instability in your mana comes from. Are you having trouble adapting your control?”

Seeing that Fei Long gave him an easy way out, Desmond decided to take it, he wanted to prevent people besides Kyuru from worrying about him. “Controlling multiple mana elements has that disadvantage, it still hasn’t managed to reassert my understanding and control, it will take me a while.”

Seeing the subtle emphasis Desmond placed on certain words, Fei Long retorted. “Well, if you want to work on it, I could help you, I had some similar problems when I repurified my bloodline.”

Deftly ending the topic, Desmond walked away from the training area and added before leaving. “Maybe we can chat later over drinks.”

Clearly showing off, Mei Fei Long used her insane speed to almost instantly appear at Xiauyue’s side and fired back at Desmond who was barely halfway back. “Sounds good, but we’ll have to finish early, I can’t leave my Xiauyue waiting for some love.”

Briefly, Fei Long felt Desmond looking at her and Xiauyue strangely, similar to when you see a homely but extremely nostalgic landscape, a look filled with sadness that was almost overwhelming. Desmond immediately let go of that sadness and recognized that he no longer had to long for moments as beautiful and warm as this one, he was no longer in that deranged world in which he had been trapped.

Pushing away those annoying memories, Desmond responded. “This must be how those people who shoot me hate looks feel every time I go out on the town with Claire.”

Claire and Xiauyue could only blush at how cheeky the people they shared a bed with were, and it didn’t take long for both of them to want to die of shame when Fei Long and Desmond started making dirty jokes.

.....

As much as he hated to admit it, Desmond knew that his little mission to rescue Lilith had weighed heavily on him. At the end of the day, that place was simply too much for anyone with a soul to take without getting scarred.

However, tiny as it was, Desmond felt the change, little by little, no longer being in that place, and now being able to even enjoy small moments of emotion, fun, and affection with people he loved or appreciated, that was exactly what he needed.

Precisely for this reason, when Desmond heard that today would be the alchemy competition, he was the first to want to go see the whole event and support Sasha, of course. As much as Mei Fei Long insisted that it wasn’t the most fun event to watch, he was determined to go.

In Desmond’s words: “How could I miss an event where my Sasha could be the protagonist?”

Leaving aside the fact that Sasha certainly blushed and was touched by Desmond’s kind words, it had to be admitted that Sasha rarely took the initiative to hog attention. Sasha was discreet by nature, leaving aside her exotic and captivating appearance. Sasha preferred working in her lab on some new project, playing with her ingredients, or watching some animated series about magical girls.

In fact, Desmond wasn’t the only one who wanted to go see Sasha, Claire and the rest had also planned to go regardless of how much Sasha insisted that there was no need to.

Without much of a vote or opinion on the issue, Sasha had to agree on the issue, which led to an emergency meeting between the girls to dress her up as beautifully and professionally as possible for the event. Sasha insisted that it was absolutely unnecessary, but none of the girls paid any attention to her.

Seeing Sasha being dragged off somewhere by the girls, Xiauyue gave Desmond and Fei Long a sidelong glance before accompanying the girls. As soon as everyone left, Fei Long spoke. “Anything you want to talk about? You seem a bit… Unstable.”

Desmond was about to evade as usual, but something in Fei Long made him stop. It wasn’t just the fact that she was one of the few friends he had in the world, nor that they get along so well, it wasn’t anything like that; but a special kind of desolation that lived deep within both of them. Realizing this, Desmond smiled with both weariness and wryness. “Looks like I’m not the only one who’s been through hell since we last met.”

As if they had agreed beforehand, Desmond and Fei Long simply let out their demons at the same time. “Two wars full of morons blinded by greed and power.” “An entire world corrupted to the point of absolute madness, cannibalism was almost the rule of the house.”

After a slight pause, they both shared a look of surprise. “I can’t say the war surprised me given the way things were as I left, but I didn’t expect a second war.” Desmond commented.

Mei Fei Long shrugged trying to appear nonchalant, but her tone of voice was heavy. “What can I say? War is almost part of our way of life.”

Desmond knew enough to understand that Fei Long wasn’t lying, but she still tried to sound calmer than she really was. It was normal, Dragonborn or not, born warrior or not, Mei Fei Long was just a girl in her twenties, having gone through the horrors of war twice and left its mark. Forget age or gender, no one goes through that kind of thing unscathed.

However, the nature of a person still had great importance. After all, unlike many other people, both Mei Fei Long and Desmond could handle bigger loads and handle them better. Of course, sure there are people out there who can walk through a battlefield full of blood and broken corpses with a smile on their face, but that had nothing to do with having mental strength, quite the opposite.

At the end of the day, people like Desmond and Mei Fei Long could plunge to the bottom of the abyss and still come out as themselves. Sure, what they had seen and experienced marked and weighed on them, but they never allowed themselves to get lost in those feelings.

Their only concern was whether their partners could take that same kind of pressure. Whether they said it out loud or not, both Desmond and Fei Long always took the initiative to take the burdens of the people they loved, not because they believed their loved ones couldn’t handle the burden; it was simply in their nature to do so.

However, there were times, especially when they themselves could barely carry the weight on their shoulders, when Fei Long and Desmond couldn’t help but worry about their loved ones, questioning what would happen when they go through something similar.

Part of the reason Desmond wanted to stay out of the way for the next few days had a lot to do with the topic, though there were other reasons involved, like him wanting to rest and temper both his mood and his mana; as well as wanting the girls to experience some independence.

For two hours, Desmond and Fei Long just talked non-stop. Without fear of being judged as weak or vulnerable, both entrusted themselves with what weighed on them. When the need to maintain their unwavering image was gone, they both reverted to mere mortals.

As a hidden bystander to this conversation, Kyuru, the mischievous fairy with a habit of spying on others had her own opinions. Among the many things Kyuru didn’t understand about humans, their understanding of fear and weakness never made sense to the fairy.

For some reason, humans had the misconception that fear was something to hide and be ashamed of, something they applied to weakness as well. However, Kyuru believed that this was stupid. Fear was nothing more than a natural reaction to things that threatened us in one way or another, something often instinctive that was part of us.

It was ridiculous to Kyuru to reject something that is part of who you are. That’s not to mention that fear is the source of bravery and virtue, just as it was of a whole range of negative things. It all depended on how one reacted to the fear, in the same way, that weakness was only a negative if you wanted to take it that way.

In the specific case of Mei Fei Long and Desmond, they decided to face their demons in their own way, sharing them with someone who would understand. Kyuru was sure that this conversation would add its own grain of sand to their strength, they would grow even more from moments like this, much more than they would grow by fighting or meditating.

Once she confirmed that everything was in order, Kyuru, as always, lost interest and turned her attention to something else. Less than five minutes later, a couple of jars of honey and berries disappeared from the residence’s kitchen.