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It was not the moment when she felt overwhelmed by discomfort or when she kept retching. Probably it was on that night when she slept with Anderson or the day she lost her first child. She tried to focus more on cooking every day because she had a terrible premonition that she might have to repeat her unhappy past.

“You are pregnant. Your baby is about 10 weeks old,” her OB-GYN doctor said.

She was not surprised to hear that. There was a subtle mix of congratulations and concerns in the doctor’s voice. As a matter of fact, she was expecting it before she met the doctor. So, what the doctor just said was only a simple confirmation of what she expected.

Janet left the hospital with a ghostly expression. The doctor gave her some advice on how to take care of herself during pregnancy, but she didn’t pay attention to it.

She got on her motorcycle and put on the accelerator pedal hard. She didn’t even know how she drove because she was so confused. It was so fortunate that she didn’t have any traffic accident while driving insanely like that. Maybe it was because she was out of mind that she already arrived in Gluto Restaurant’s parking lot. While Janet was staring at the crowded restaurant for a while, a valet parking agent came over and handed her a ticket.

“Welcome. Oh, Chef Janet! Are you here to see Mr. Anderson?”

“Wait a minute. I have something to think about.”

“Pardon?”

The agent looked confused, but Janet didn’t care. She was just looking inside the restaurant. As if the agent thought he had better leave her alone, the agent went back. She kept looking inside the hall where she could not find Anderson at all.

But she didn’t go inside the restaurant.

***

“Chef, table 7 guest’s plates are almost empty.”

“Okay. Anderson, did you hear that? Check it.”

When the manager said that, Fabio turned to Anderson and gave him a brief order.

Anderson was thinking about something at the moment. As far as he remembered, the customer at table 7 was eating a sea bream dish with truffles soaked in olive oil.

And the next order was...

“Was the order a small octopus lasagna?”

“Yes.”

Fortunately, he guessed it right. Anderson checked the pasta section with a sigh of relief. The lasagna, which he put in the oven about 10 minutes ago, would be completed in about 5 more minutes. The customers would not have to wait so long.

There was quite a difference between his former life as a demi chef and his current life as a sous chef here at Gluto’s. When he was a Demi chef, all he had to do was just follow sous chef Raphael’s order that he should make the order ready by the given time. But as the sous chef here at Gluto’s, he was in a position to consider and calculate the cooking time by himself.

Of course, he didn’t have to spend less time cooking in person than before, but he felt he was busier.

In addition, Rachel was certainly more kind than Fabio or Amelia. For example, she was kind enough to instruct her sous chef Raphael to get ready in several minutes after checking when the customers at which table would finish their meal. But things were different in Gluto’s. Amelia and Fabio gave Anderson only the name of the table where the customers were almost done eating, then had him find out other information about the table in question.

Probably they did so to improve Anderson’s abilities, but it was tough for him, although they meant well. Since he had been accustomed to his life as a demi chef, he felt tired twice as much as before.

Of course, he also felt his new life as a sous chef was fruitful. Actually, he spent almost all his life at Gluto’s, but he felt completely different now he assumed a sous chef job here. Of course, it wasn’t just his sous chef position that has changed. His skills have changed, his sense of gastronomy had changed and his goal had also changed.

When he worked at Rose Island, that was his whole world. Min-joon was the only guy he had to face every day. Of course, it was good for him to have a rival, but he didn’t have a chance to reflect on himself while he was overly conscious of Min-joon as his rival.

But his life at Gluto’s was like a valuable medicine for Anderson. While he was working there, he could feel less competitive than before, and he could properly look at the goal he really wanted to achieve. His dream was not to be a better chef than Min-joon but to become a great chef. But while he was working in Rose Island, he just forgot about his goal because of the competitive spirit.

Anderson almost called it a day when Fabio pulled up a chair and sat down by him.

“So, you think you are comfortable working here?”

“Well, I’ve been spending almost all my life here, as you know.”

“No, what I mean is your new position as the sous chef.”

“Well, I wouldn’t say I’ve already gotten on top of it, but I think I’ll get used to it better.”

“It looks like you have learned one thing very clearly at Rose Island, aside from other things.”

“One thing?” Anderson asked, puzzled.

Fabio replied with a smile, “Well, it looks as if you give it a lick and promise.”

“Are you swearing at me now?”

“No, I’m not blaming you, but I want to praise you. You’ve always tried to be perfect in cooking. But that came back to bite you. You can’t do good calculations all the time when you’re really busy. In that situation, you have to rely on your instinct and senses to get better results. I mean your senses as a chef.”

When he said that, Anderson instantly recalled Min-joon and Kaya. Certainly, Kaya totally depended on her cooking senses from start to finish. But Min-joon was different. Min-joon also relied on his senses, but at the same time, he tried to calculate his senses. Anderson wondered whether he could do the same.

‘Well, I don’t even have to follow him.’

Competing with Min-joon did not mean that Anderson would have to walk the same path as him. Anderson might find his own way. Of course, he would be able to know which way was better at the end of their long cooking journey.

Anderson said, “I feel like I can get close to my goal these days.”

“What? Your cooking?”

“Yeah. So, from now on, I’ll focus more on cooking. Let me put down my routine stuff and focus on cooking.”

“Hey. I think I’ve flattered you too much. Are you now walking on air?”

“Nope, I’m serious now.”

Anderson looked at Fabio with a sullen expression, but Fabio just chuckled as if he was funny.

At that moment, the valet agent, who was walking into the restaurant, saw Anderson and stopped.

“Anderson, you are here!”

“Oh, yes, what’s going on?”

“Well, Janet was here a little while ago, then left.”

“Janet? I haven’t seen her around here today.”

“She stayed for a few minutes in the parking lot, then she just went back. I was not going to tell you this, but she looked quite serious.”

“Really?”

Anderson immediately recalled her. She always looked serious, but given that the valet agent mentioned her serious expression like that, Anderson felt she really was today.

‘What’s the matter with her?’

Anderson just felt she would have a hard time as the new sous chef at Rose Island.

“Thank you. Let me talk to her.”

“Alright. Have a good night.”

“You, too.”

Anderson said goodbye briefly, then picked up the phone.

Watching him, Fabio said jokingly, “Hey, it looks like you are in a romantic relationship with her.”

“We’re just friends.”

“Yeah, I know. You guys always start as just friends.”

But Anderson didn’t respond, frowning at him. Then he called Janet. He wanted to have a drink with her for a long time.

But she didn’t answer his phone.

***

“So, what the hell is going on?”

Anderson looked at Havier with an annoyed expression. He wasn’t angry with Havier, but Janet. For some time, Janet didn’t answer Anderson’s phone calls, and she immediately left the restaurant as soon as she finished her work. Anderson felt it awkward to visit her house, but at the same time, he didn’t want to neglect her.

Havier said, “Man, she’s driving me nuts, too. In the kitchen, she is really working well. Yeah, much better than usual. But except when she is cooking, she looks like out of herself. She wouldn’t answer if I called her, and she is pretty much tough toward the kitchen staff, too. Man, she is scary”

“Anything unusual happened to her? For example, was she given a good scolding by Rachel?”

“Well, that kind of thing is common, not unusual.”

“Then, what the heck is it?”

When he asked harshly, Havier moved his lips as if he had something to say.

Anderson narrowed his eyes and stared at him.

“You know something about her, right?”

“Yep, but I can’t say it with my mouth.”

“Why are you so mean, man?”

“Oh, really no. I really can’t say it with my mouth for you and Janet. I don’t want to make matters complicated. Just go and ask her. She wouldn’t say anything even if I asked her.”

After letting out a sigh, Anderson concluded he had to meet her. As soon as he arrived at Janet’s house, he glanced at the yard. There was no motorcycle. It was midnight already.

So, he pressed the doorbell just in case, but it was Janet’s roommate who appeared.

She said annoyingly, with an expression mixed with drowsiness and irritation.

“She hasn’t come in yet.”

“Until now?”

“Yep. She has been getting a bit late these days. I don’t think she is late for drinking.

I just don’t know where she is going around, but...”

She smiled bitterly, then asked, “I wonder what kind of relationship you have with her. Is she wandering around because of you these days?”

“Sorry for coming this late.”

“Would you like to come in and wait?”

“No, I would rather wait here.”

“Sure, it’s up to you.”

At that moment, a black motorcycle, which looked quite heavy because of various equipment attached to it, entered the parking lot with a loud exhaust noise. While taking off her helmet, getting off the motorcycle, she encountered him and stiffened on the spot.

“Anderson?”

“Why are you so late like this? Did you drink?”

“You’re talking like my boyfriend.”

Janet laughed as if it was fun. But he stared at her with a frown. She didn’t reek of any alcohol.

“I heard you came to Gluto’s the other day.”

“I went there by mistake.”

“If you came to my place, you wanted to see me. What’s the matter with you?”

“It’s not a big deal. So, just butt out.”

“If it’s not serious, just say it. Otherwise, I’ll keep bugging you.”

Since he was being so stubborn, she looked at him quietly. Anderson didn’t like the way she looked at him, which was a mix of distress and affection.

She said, “You’ll regret it.”

“Well, if I don’t listen to your explanation right now, I think I’ll regret it more.”

She smiled at that, but it was rather a sad smile

“Anderson, have you ever thought that I’m a bad woman?”

“What?”

“I thought I was a bad woman when I first lost my child, and I feel the same even these days.”

Anderson just stared at her blankly. He didn’t know what the hell she was trying to say.

“What are you trying to say?”

“If you hear it, it’s going to be tough for you, too.”

“What the hell are you talking about?”

This time, he screamed at her, but she was not surprised.

Instead, she began to respond in a subdued voice, “I’m sorry, Anderson. I really wanted to keep it to myself by all means, but...”

She was choked with tears at that moment. She was stricken with disappointment in herself, the cruel reality, and fear of the future. All of that eventually broke down her strong pride and pretense of strength.

She leaned her head against his collarbone, crying.

“I hate myself because I think all of this is like a curse because of my greed in this situation. I just hate myself for wishing I lost it again...”

At that moment, he recalled when she showed such a smile for the last time.

“Hey, that condom you used that night was cheap.”

That was the worst confession he heard from somebody in his life.