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Chapter 855  Sappy

He sat up in bed, blinking away the remnants of sleep before stretching his stiff muscles.

Why did his alarm go off earlier than usual? He mused when he saw it was not seven in the morning yet.

As he glanced around the bedroom, his eyes fell on his suitcase, and then he remembered the reason he had set the alarm earlier that usual. It was so he could unpack and organize his stuff before leaving for his training.

The visit to Ludus had been far more eventful and memorable than he anticipated. From the moment they arrived to the moment they left, it had been filled with drama, and it was funny that Amy was the first person he saw when he arrived and the last too.

It seemed like everything he had done during his trip was directly related to Amy. One would think he had made the trip solely for her sake.

Lucas shook his head, not wanting to start his day with thoughts of her. Before leaving for Ludus, his excuse for thinking of her had been that he was worried about Miley\'s situation, now that Miley was okay and all had been resolved, he no longer had any excuse to be consumed with thoughts of her, especially not when he had so much to do, Lucas decided as he swung his legs over the side of the bed and reached for his suitcase.

He placed it on the bed, and as he unzipped the main compartment, his fingers brushed against something soft in the pocket of his jacket. He pulled it out and a small smile played on his lips as he unfolded the now slightly crumpled piece of paper. It was the leftover thank you card from the funeral, Amy\'s email address scrawled messily on the front.

He reread the email address she had scrawled on it, and his lips curved in a smile at the memory of their conversation.

He hadn\'t expected her to be that chatty considering how teary she had been at the funeral.

He winced slightly, remembering the eulogy Amy had delivered. Her raw emotion had been palpable, and for a brief moment, he had allowed himself to get lost in the memories she\'d shared about Miley.

He pictured her tear-streaked face at the funeral, her raw vulnerability, and a part of him wanted to reach out, to find out how she was doing now.

Should he email her or not? He mused, thinking that since he had agreed that they exchange emails, it was only right that he sent her an email.

But then he remembered his conversation with Lucy. Her words echoed in his mind, raising a wall of doubt. Was he just being nice? Or was there more to it? Like he had told everyone, he wasn\'t ready for a relationship yet, and he meant it.

He sighed, running a hand through his hair. Perhaps he could just send an email,  letting her know he had arrived safely and to find out if she has gone back to Ludus. The email would be polite and impersonal, he told himself, but then the memory of Amy\'s smile, the way her eyes had twinkled when she\'d suggested they exchange texts, stopped him.

Maybe it was best if he let it be. If he ran into her in the future, he would simply claim to have lost the email address, Lucas decided even though he knew that would be a poor excuse since he could easily ask Lucy for her contact if something like that happened and he really meant to reach out to her.

Lucas sighed and shook his head when he realized that once again, he was distracted from what he was supposed to be doing and was thinking about Amy when he said he wouldn\'t do that anymore.

He raised his head when Tyler knocked on the door, then pushed it open gently, "Luke? Are you up?" Tyler asked before his gaze settled on Lucas.

"Yeah. What\'s up?" Lucas asked as he gazed at Tyler, wondering why he looked sort of pensive so early in the morning.

"Uhm, can we talk for a moment?" Tyler asked, wishing her hadn\'t agreed to be the bearer of such a news. n/ô/vel/b//jn dot c//om

"Sure. Is something wrong?" Lucas asked, and Tyler sighed deeply.

"There is something you need to see," he said, then handed his phone to Lucas so he would see the news directly from the source.

Lucas\' brows were pulled together in a frown as he took the phone and then gazed down at it to see what Tyler was showing him.

The moment he saw Rachel\'s picture on the screen, his heart skipped a beat, and then his gaze shot to the caption on the post.

"Rachel is dead?" He asked in disbelief without looking up from the post.

"Lucy called while you were asleep and asked that I let you know," Tyler explained as he sat down on the bed, ready to comfort Lucas and assure him that it wasn\'t his fault and he shouldn\'t blame himself.

Lucas said nothing as he read the suicide note and then when he was done he exhaled deeply, "Too bad she chose to end her life this way," Lucas said as he returned the phone to Tyler.

"How do you feel?" Tyler asked, watching Lucas closely.

"How am I supposed to feel? I feel sorry for her that she lived selfishly and also chose to die the same way," Lucas said flatly, and Tyler raised an eyebrow.

"You\'re not feeling bad or blaming yourself, right?" He asked, and Lucas scoffed.

"Did I do anything wrong that I need to blame myself for? I won\'t let her control me even with her death. This is her attempt to guilt trip me into regretting the break up. I did what was best for me, and she has also done what she believed is best for her. It is a shame that she is dead, but I have no regrets. If I was going to regret this, then I wouldn\'t have cut ties with her in the first place," Lucas said firmly and Tyler let out a sigh of relief.

"Good. I\'m relieved you think of it this way. I was sort of worried that you would be broken by this," Tyler admitted.

"Broken?"

"Yes. You were with her for so many years, and she is your first love after all," Tyler said and Lucas nodded.

"I guess so. I\'m not saying I don\'t feel saddened by her death. I\'m just saying, it\'s the same way I would feel if I heard of the passing of a neighbor or an acquaintance. I\'m just not broken by it or devastated. I\'ve spent the last couple of weeks detaching myself emotionally from her and I never planned to set eyes on her ever again, so it\'s all the same to me," Lucas said logically and Tyler nodded.

"That\'s good then. I will go get ready and leave for work," Tyler said as he rose to leave.

"Now that she won\'t be bothering you anymore, don\'t you think you should get a phone? That way your family can contact you easily," Tyler suggested.

"Is that your way of saying you are tired of letting me borrow your phone?" Lucas asked dryly.

"Yes, please," Tyler said and Lucas chuckled.

"Alright. I will. But first let me give Lu a call. Knowing how she overthinks, she is probably blaming herself and feeling bad," Lucas said, worried about Lucy.

"Sure. Bring the phone over when you\'re done," Tyler said before walking away, and the moment he left, Lucas dialed Lucy\'s line on video call, knowing that she was probably done with work for the day and was on her way home.

The call connected on the first ring, "Hey, Ty…"

"Why would Tyler be the one calling you?" Lucas asked dryly.

"Because it\'s his phone and he can call me when he wants to," Lucy said, and then narrowed her eyes.

"Has he spoken with you yet?" Lucy asked, wondering why Lucas looked and sounded like his normal self if he had heard the news from Tyler.

"Is there something he is supposed to tell me? Don\'t tell me you plan to elope with him," Lucas said, and Lucy rolled her eyes.

"Why would I elope with him when I have a man? He didn\'t say anything to you?" Lucy asked, wondering if Tyler had forgotten to tell Tyler about it or had left it up to her to break the news to him.

"Is there something I need to know?" Lucas asked, choosing to play ignorant so he would know how Lucy was feeling.

Tyler, that bastard! She couldn\'t believe he had left it up to her after assuring her that he would tell Lucas.

Taking a deep breath, Lucy decided to tell Lucas about it, "Uhm, well, it\'s about Rachel," Lucy said, and Lucas frowned.

"What about her? Don\'t tell me she showed up at your office again," he asked, and she shook her head.

"No. It\'s not that. It\'s worse. It\'s not good news, Luke. She is dead," Lucy said, and then waited for the shock and disbelief, but Lucas merely nodded.

"Hm. I see," he said and she frowned.

"I\'m serious, Luke. She committed suicide. She is dead," Lucy said and Lucas nodded once again.

"I heard you the first time," he said, and she narrowed her eyes.

"You knew, didn\'t you?" She asked suspiciously, and he shrugged.

"Yeah. Tyler told me…"

"You bastard!" She spat, and he chuckled.

"You\'re my twin, Lu. If I\'m a bastard, you are also a bastard, bastard," he said, wanting to lighten the mood.

"Are you okay?" Lucy asked with a concerned frown.

"Sure. Why not? She was dead to me, anyway. So, why won\'t I be okay? The question is, are you okay? Or are you guilt ridden?" He asked, and she shrugged.

"At first I was feeling very guilty, but I feel better now," she admitted, and he nodded.

"Good. That\'s why I called. I wanted to make sure you were not feeling unnecessarily guilty. What happened between us and what she did has nothing to do with you, so don\'t let it affect you," Lucas advised, and she nodded.

"I\'m more relieved that you\'re okay. I was worried that the news might upset you. Mom was worried too," Lucy explained.

"Well, you all don\'t need to worry. I\'m an adult and I know better than to let this get to me more than it should, and you should know better too. She is trying to manipulate our feelings even with her death. Don\'t let her," Lucas advised.

"Alright. Sure. By the way, Amy was worried about you too," Lucy said, and Lucas frowned.

"Amy? Why?"

"Why else? She was worried that the news would upset you," Lucy said, and Lucas shrugged.

"Well, let her know there is no need for her to be upset. I\'m perfectly fine," Lucas said dismissively.

"What?" He asked when Lucy kept staring at him without saying anything.

"Nothing other the fact that I can\'t believe you told Amy what I said," Lucy said and Lucas frowned.

"She told you I told her that?" He asked and she nodded.

"She also asked if I told you that because I might have a problem with her having feelings for you," Lucy said, and this time his eyebrow shot up.

"She asked you that? Why would she ask you that? What did you say?" Lucas asked and Lucy smiled.

"I gave her my blessing," she said and Lucas eyed her with disapproval.

"What blessing? Did she tell you anything else? What did you both discuss?" He asked curiously.

"So you would go back to her and tell her whatever I tell you? Nah. I\'m not telling you anything," she said and Lucas scowled.

"So, why did you bring it up in the first place then?" He asked with displeasure.

"So, you can do with the information what you please. I\'m sure you\'re an adult and can connect dots," Lucy said and Lucas shook his head.

"Whatever. I have to go now. I have a busy day ahead," Lucas said and Lucy nodded.

"Alright…"

"Why are you still at the office by this time?" Lucas asked when he took note of her environment.

"Tom is stuck in a meeting. I\'m waiting for him," she explained.

"Why? You can\'t find your way home without him?" Lucas asked dryly.

"He is my home," Lucy said, and Lucas cringed.

"That sounds weirdly sappy coming from you. I will let mom and dad know you no longer need a room at home, since Tom is your home now," he said and Lucy giggled.

"You\'re an idiot," she said with a shake of her head and Lucas chuckled as he hung up.

Lucy let out a sigh of relief, glad that Lucas was alright and not as affected by the news as they had all assumed he would be.