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She searched for him, but her vision seemed impaired, only seeing a mixture of black and white hazes covering what was in front of her.

“Laura.” It repeated. His voice sounded like he was beckoning her, asking her to come closer. But where? When she could hardly see anything.

She wished to shout back to him, also to call his name. But no words came out of her mouth. It was just mumblings that she could not understand. What was wrong with her?

Then, alarming bells echoed in her head.

What was that? What does it mean? She had no idea as her confusion grew, feeling her frustration as beads of sweat formed on her skin.

“Mrs. Hamilton?” A different voice penetrated her subconsciousness. Suddenly, she was being pulled from her deep sleep as her eyes opened to bright lights.

.....

It was morning based on the rays of the sun coming from the windows. But that was not all. People crowded the bed as voices echoed in the spacious room.

“Code blue.” The speakers hidden in the walls kept blaring into the entire floor.

What did it mean? She did not understand as she finally looked at the woman before her. The uniformed woman was talking to her, but she could hardly understand her with all the noise.

As if everyone was fussing around.

Then.

“Ethan?” She called him, but he did not respond. She wanted to see him, but people surrounded his bed. “Ethan? What is going on?”

She immediately stood up from the chair she had slept on, not minding the aching muscles from her uncomfortable position. But she was unable to pass the hospital staff already blocking her way.

“Mrs. Hamilton, we need you to come with us while we work on your husband.” The woman who had woken her up spoke to her again.

She finally heard her, but she still did not understand what was happening to her husband. Why was he not responding to her call? Why were there so many people in the room?

But tears were already running down her cheeks because deep inside, she knew the answers to her questions. She just refused to acknowledge it yet.

“Ethan,” Laura finally pushed through, pushing herself between the man and woman, hindering her from reaching her husband.

Finally, she had a glimpse of him, but what she saw tore her heart. He was struggling in his bed, seemingly laboring in his breathing, his eyes were closed, but she could still see his pain.

The machines filled her ears with noise as they echoed its harsh warnings. It sounded not good. Even she had no idea what it was supposed to mean.

She grabbed her chance to hold him, squeezing his arm to make him know she was there. She believed he would recognize her touch even if he could not see her.

“Ethan, I am here.” She repeated, hoping he would hear her. But he did not respond to her voice. But she did not say anything else. She just stared at him for as long as she could.

“Mrs. Hamilton?” Another manly voice came to her side, but she refused to focus on him. Her eyes were on the man lying on the bed. “I need you to come with me.”

She suddenly felt too weak. She could feel that her knees were about to buckle in. Luckily, the man wrapped his arms around her, guiding her outside the room.

She did not want to leave him, but she had no strength anymore to protest, to stop the man from dragging her away from him. As much as she wished to stay by his side while he fought to survive, she knew they would not let her.

What would happen now?

She had no answer to that. All she knew. Her heart was slowly breaking into pieces, seeing the scene before her. She knew this was different since the doctors looked frustrated as they shouted orders around them.

Other staff, the nurses, seemed to be running around, doing their best to keep up. Machines entered the room, and people came and went in the little span of a few minutes.

“How is Ethan?” She finally dared to ask, but nobody heard her because she stood alone by the door, looking at the chaotic scene right before her eyes.

She was all by herself.

The people who asked her to step out were now busy saving her husband. She stood by the door, wondering if he would come out of this alive.

Should she go back inside? She wanted so, so, so much to hold his hand and whisper to him that she was here. But the doctor said she had to stay out of the way while they worked to save him.

She felt torn between her want and his need.

“Ethan, I am here.” Her voice almost cracked, but she managed to control it, saying it louder so it would cross the room and reach his ears.

Another nurse came to her side, encouraging her to sit in the waiting area, but she would never leave him. Not now. She had to be here no matter what.

He had to know that no matter what happened, he was not alone because she never left him. Just like she was not alone right now. He would always be in her heart and mind.

“I love you, Ethan.” Her heart only hoped it could send waves that would tell his heart how much. “I love you so much, now and forever.” It was a whisper, a promise, hoping there would come a time they would meet again.

She never failed to say it to him, every day and every chance she had, but today more than ever, she had to say it to him. He had to hear her, especially if this was the last time.

She had to say goodbye if that was her only choice.